I thought I’d get a little personal on here, any maybe talk about something that isn’t directly related to the little people in my house.
After all, us Moms are MORE than mothers. We are dimensional people with hobbies and passions outside of motherhood. Forgetting these things is a sure fire way to completely lose yourself in the mothering journey. Motherhood is wonderful, it’s the most important work we have, but we are so much MORE than that, as well.
I lost myself for many years. I let my hobbies and interests fall aside as I became completely consumed with raising these little people. It’s easy to do that in the beginning. Who has time to pursue a hobby when a toddler spends 1000% of her time racing through the house to see what she can climb or knock over? Or when you stay up all night with the baby, and still somehow have to stay conscious to keep the toddler alive during the day? I think we all lose ourselves a little bit in those early days.
The kids grow. Faster than I’d like. Faster than is comfortable, sometimes. You blink and they are in school and can play outside by themselves without needing a cautious eye on them 100% of the time. You can exhale. You can rediscover yourself.
I’m in that rediscovery phase right now, and can I tell you that I am LOVING it. In 2017, I challenged myself to a series of races (well, my husband signed up for them and my FOMO had me calling out, “me, too!” so I signed up with him). We did a lot of 5ks, a handful of 10ks, and it peaked in September with the Charles Street 12.
All the months leading up to September had me filled with dread. 12 miles is a lot of stupid miles. They make cars for a reason.
But I got out there and I trained. Not the best way- life got in the way and I found myself doing long runs maybe every other week, and not much of anything else. In fact, I learned that before a run and for maybe the first mile, I hate running. I’m grumpy. I complain a lot. Most of the time my husband had to practically shove me out the door to do my every-other-week training run. Once I got past that first mile, however? I found I enjoyed it. I felt powerful. Strong. Those miles alone gave me space to meditate, to mull over things that were bothering me, to find solutions to problems. I cleared my head. I tired myself out to the point of better sleep at night. That didn’t stop me from hating it all over again the next week, though. All too soon, I found myself at the starting line, excited and scared.
And you know what? I freaking loved it. It was 100% my favorite race, despite all the bitching and complaining leading up to it, including the morning of. And the first mile.
Naturally, this means I’ve decided to do a half marathon for 2018. If I can do a 12 miler, surely I can handle 1.1 more miles.
This year, however, I want to do things differently. I don’t want to just survive the races. I don’t want to barely train.
My husband and I started doing T25 in the evenings. When we finish it, we will probably go into a 3x a week maintenance mode. I’ve finally started using my Arena Club membership again. I’m trying to be cautious not to over-do it- I have a tendency to jump in too fast, burn out, and quit. So I’m going only 2-3x a week, for strength training and a Body Step class to further strengthen my quads and glutes. (And I’ll skip T25 on intense gym days, and cheer my husband on instead. I really enjoy working out with him, and the accountability is so nice!)
And when I miss a gym class because life gets in the way (because we all know it will), I also have Aaptiv to help out. Aaptiv is awesome! I use their guided meditations when I drive to help center me. They have guided outdoor and indoor runs, as well as elliptical programs to make boring workouts more interesting (along with strength training, yoga, cycling, etc) It’s a lot of the benefits of group fitness, but on your own schedule. It’s all audio, so you don’t have to squint at your screen. And the music is great- I get tired of my own playlists. I plan on following their half marathon training once the weather warms up beyond these single digit temps, and on days where I’m just really tight, I like to use their stretching classes to loosen me up.
I plan on getting back in shape for 2018. Doing a lot of races, and rediscovering who I am in the process. (I’ve also rediscovered my love of art- watercolors and acrylic paint, drawing, I’ve had a blast!)